The Dawdler

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Are you quiet or vocal when watching television, a movie, or a film? Can you sit there with others and watch silently, or are you filled with oohs, ahhs, and other gesture forms? For the most part I like to sit quietly and watch and listen. David reads a lot so often times the news that I watch on television is already “old news” to him so he will add his commentary but I usually get aggravated and ask him to let me listen to the broadcasters. During films or movies I may react to some things but mostly I like to just sit and enjoy quietly.

How many rolls of toilet paper does your household use monthly on average? Probably around 8. It seems like we go through it so quickly and I have never actually kept track. I do tend to try and find brands that provide more sheets on their rolls while losing some of their softness. I don’t like the really puffy, linty stuff.

Do you believe that if a person takes a life, they destroy a part of themselves – what are your views on this? I would think that if a person purposely takes the life of another they are destroying themselves and can never be whole again. Something like that doesn’t leave you ever. That being said, if it is accidental the person will live with it forever but may use the experience to help others. I just have never understood how anyone can take the life of someone else and think that they are justified to do so. The only time I can see it slightly making sense is when really bad criminals are put to death. I don’t think any country or government should have to use its resources on someone who admittedly expresses how sick their minds are. Yes there are so many ethical questions but…
You know, I sort of feel like the truck driver that pulled out in front of my son’s motorcycle took my son’s life. Sometimes I don’t feel this way but more than often I do. I don’t feel like he deserves anything more than what he has now and that is the knowledge of what he did. I’m not saying he did it on purpose but there were never any repercussions for him and my son lost his life. I know some people would not agree with me, thinking I am being “evil” in some way, but it is how I get through my days. There are consequences to everything we do.

4 thoughts on “The Dawdler

  1. Intereasting answers Christine, sorry for my delay in writing back – there was no pingback and it was as l was reading Fandango’s answers is where l saw your comment.

    There are consequences to everything we do. This is true.

    The driver of the truck – was he at fault – did he run a light or a junction, was he careless in his behaviour to read the road? No, not a defence of his actions, just a question. Could he be living with the nightmares of that day do you think?

    I can relate in part, when l was twenty four l was sitting in my car at a T junction – it was winter – there was ice on the road. Black ice. A forty footer arctic slid on the ice, no fault of his own and slammed into my car. The car was shunted up to a tree and l was pinned there…

    I lived.

    But my fiance and my eighteen month old son who were in the car at the same time did not.

    In hospital the driver came to see me, he was in shock, his life was not the same, he appologised. It wasn’t his fault. He was a father himself. Although l forgave him, it was not my forgiveness to give, it was life that went dark at that point. His life was ruined and a part of my life was ruined forever. I carried that grief from 1987 to 2017 when l finally forgave myself and started to move on with my life again. However the driver committed suicide two years after that crash. He left a wife and three children behind. The driver of the truck like me suffered with nightmares and punnished himself daily.

    There are always sadly consequences to everything we do.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow, I am so sorry for your loss. That must have been so hard. I lost my mom when I was 23 and death is so hard to understand at that age.
      The driver of the truck had been drinking but supposedly at his attorney’s house and he didn’t fully stop at the stop sign. He pulled out but my son was going fast too so he hit the truck. I can’t be angry even though it hurts so badly. I’m impressed that you were finally able to release yourself from that guilt. I have guilt and regret about many things and I try to live positively and not focus on that, it is sort of a waste of time to me.
      The only thing that angers me so much is the people who complain about their parents or their kids to the point of a sort of hatefulness. Losing so many people has really taught me not to take it for granted that people will always be there.
      Hugs to you…


  2. Christine, I think your perfectly right to feel like that about your sons killer, maybe the truck driver didn’t do it on purpose, but still, he wasn’t punished, but your dear son lost his life, for no reason other than carelessness on that truck drivers part. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

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